Lydia Rwechungura
Born : 1976
Country : Tanzania
Organisation : Network of Young People living with HIV and AIDS (NYP+); Association of HIV and AIDS Activists; ICW Tanzania
Campaigns for : HIV awareness and access to health services for PLWHA

I got married in 2000 and became pregnant in 2001. In the second month of pregnancy I visited an antenatal clinic, the clinicians were very unfriendly and though they asked me to have an HIV test I was not convinced. In 2002, I gave birth to my daughter and breastfed her. At that time, I was beginning to have AIDS symptoms, especially on my skin. I asked my husband to go for testing. He refused and we continued to have sex without using protection. After a while, I told him that if he did not go with me for testing, I would stop having sex with him. He finally accepted and, together with our child, we went for HIV testing. The following week, the counsellor informed us that my daughter and I tested HIV positive, and my husband tested HIV negative. He was told to return for another test after three months.

From that day, my husband changed completely; he moved out of our bedroom and refused to eat the food I prepared. He told all his relatives in Dar es Salaam that I was HIV positive, that I knew about my status before we were married, and wanted to deliberately kill him. As if that was not enough, he and his sister began demanding to know who the father of our daughter was, as it could not possibly be him considering his status.
My husband went on stigmatising me and I eventually became ill and was admitted to hospital with a CD4 count of only six. Once discharged, my relatives took me to the family house to care for me, but after a while my husband said he wanted me back home claiming he too could take good care of me. I refused, but his relatives reminded us that they had paid a dowry for him to marry me through good and bad times. According to our traditions and culture, I belonged to him.

I had no choice but to return. Things got worse when I developed a fungus in my body; even my heart was surrounded by tuberculosis (TB) fluid. I told the doctor about the difficult conditions I was living with at home and pleaded with him to admit me for three months so I could regain my strength. The doctor, with my relatives, convinced my husband that I should be hospitalized.

While in hospital, I recalled all that had happened in my life and realised a woman can struggle at the hands of someone she loves, instead of getting their support. I thought if a young woman of my education who knows her rights faces stigma like this, what about those who are not educated, well off, or do not know their rights? As women, many of us do not have the power to refuse sex when we do not want it. I prayed and promised God that when I regained my strength I would use my experience and stand up for the rights of women and girls.
With spiritual counselling I forgave my husband, but I knew that we could no longer live together. I found a house, took our daughter and left. Iman, my daughter, and I have since started a new life and we are both on ARV medication.

With the advice and assistance of a lawyer, I filed for separation, and in 2007 will be able to proceed with a divorce. I was granted full custody of my daughter and, under the advice of my lawyer, prepare my will identifying a guardian for Iman in the event of my death.

I am now a counsellor for different groups and networks of people living with HIV and AIDS and faith based organisations (Christian and Muslim groups). I am a Coordinator for the Network of Young People living with HIV and AIDS (NYP+) and the Association of HIV and AIDS activists in Tanzania. I do home based care in partnership with networks of widows and disabled women living with HIV and AIDS.
I facilitate HIV and AIDS training in the workplace in partnership with the Tanzanian Government Ministries and the private sector. With assistance from peers, openly with HIV, we are planning an outreach to commercial sex workers and other marginalised groups with the aim of creating awareness on HIV and AIDS.

I run a program with a group of young women and girls living with HIV and AIDS that links them with primary and secondary schools, and the university initiating discussions among peers about HIV and AIDS. Young women, particularly, struggle with aspects of sexuality that conflict with their cultural background, and children receive little formal guidance on sexuality; many people in Tanzania believe that education on sexuality encourages young people to engage in sexual activities.

Poverty makes young women anxious to have better things. Girls and young women are seduced by the promise of a better life through marriage. Some families benefit financially from these relationships. I realised that the trust developed in these relationships keep young women from demanding safer sex. The rationale is that if a man is able to provide for a woman, he would not harm her.

I am now working with the International Community of Women living with HIV and AIDS (ICW) as an Officer for the Parliamentary leadership for Women’s Health (PWH) project in Tanzania. One of my responsibilities is to link HIV positive women to other agencies, partners and parliamentarians, as may be appropriate to enhance HIV and AIDS responses. This job enables me to reach more people in different regions and fulfil my goal of assisting women and girls living with HIV and AIDS to benefit from health services and be represented in policy issues.

Five young women living with HIV and AIDS have been a particular powerful source of information to me in terms of their personal experiences. Being young, we can make a difference and change the world. Let us, as young women, join hands in different countries and make an impact on HIV and AIDS. Life has to go on and we have to show it, so stand up and move your faith forward; put it into action. We can do it!

Toolbox: Speak Out

• Being strategic will assist you to get your point across and have an impact. You need to be heard in a significant way and reach as large an audience as possible, mobilizing your community with a specific message that will encourage people to continue to advocate for a particular cause.

For steps to maximize your message and more profiles on young women:
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